When my husband and I got married he mentioned that he would the kids to be homeschooled. Now, he had already talked me out of two kids and into four. I had grown up thinking that I would have a career. I would be a business woman, and I was well on my way up the corporate ladder. So naturally my kids would go to public school, maybe even to daycare. Michael and I came to a compromise. I would stay home with the kids, but then they would go to school. I was convinced that this was best for them and me. Looking back I see how selfish I was. Not that every woman who sends their kids off to school is selfish. Certainly not! Homeschooling is not for everyone. It is a decision that should be made between you, your spouse, and God. It was what God has called me to do. This is the first year that I feel that in my bones. Even though I came to homeschooling as, I felt, a public school refugee, my reasons have grown and matured somewhat.
You should know that it's not easy, but if you want to accomplish something great it should be beyond your reach. It should only be possible if God is leading you every step of the way. You can't do this alone. Even with God's help you will feel like a failure. But it's worth it.
Homeschooling is one of the best decisions that I feel I have ever made for my children. There will be days when you feel like you're on cloud 9. You've watched your kids FINALLY understand long division, or they've decided that they actually DO like to read. There's that look of accomplishment in their eyes when they finally get something that has taken them a long time to understand. Your heart soars when you see that. You helped them with that. My family gets to laugh together every day. My kids aren't stressed. We pray together for each other. There's a bond that my family has that I can't say we would have if we didn't homeschool. We experience life together. That's a blessing.
If you haven't decided if you would like t to homeschool, pray. Ask God, and He will surely show you. Homeschooling isn't for every family. It's a big decision. Don't let your's or anyone else's preconceived ideas and ideals direct you. Let God. Don't take this on without Him. Believe me, you don't want to.
If you've decided to homeschool your children my first bit of advice would be to write down why you want to educate your children at home. Why write it down? You will need to remember why you chose to follow this path on the hard days. Additionally, many people will ask why you've chosen to homeschool. Sometimes you'll have to defend your decision. What are your reasons and goals? Think beyond just the educational. Pray about it. Write them down. Keep them close. Pray about every aspect of homeschooling. When you're done praying, pray some more. Then find some homeschooling friends and ask for a heap of advice. You'll need it.
Here are my reasons for homeschooling in no particular order.
1. We're Christians, and we don't compartmentalize that part of our lives. Jesus is a part of everything that we are, do, and think. I want my kids to learn about the intricacy that God used when creating the Earth, and see the complexity in it. I want them to see the creativity and beauty of the words that God gave us in literature. I want them to see how God created order during math lessons. I want them to see how He gave us free will, and what we've done with that through history. They would not get that with a public school education.
2. Family unity. Besides God, the most important thing is family. We found that when our kids were in public school that we were a pretty disjointed family. When we homeschool we know better how to pray for each other, help each other, and love each other. As our kids parents we also believe that it is our job to teach our kids character. Home educating allows me more chances to do that. Lastly, there's a bond there that I can't explain. It's something that you have to experience.
3. One on one attention. No one knows my children the way my husband and I do. We have their best interests in mind at all times. I know exactly where they are struggling academically, and because I only have four students I can give them as much undivided attention and help as they need. If one of the kids is struggling in an area, I don't have to push them to grasp a concept by a certain time. This is pretty important to us because one of my kids is dyslexic, and another has ADD. Neither one of them was ready to start reading at age 5. We've been able to teach them a little more slowly, with far more attention, so that they don't get frustrated and shut down. This doesn't mean that they won't catch up. Many times with kids that take longer to learn something, they get to a point where it seems that the gates of learning open up and gush on them. This was certainly true of my son. In homeschooling no one gets left behind.
4. We want to help our kids to master concepts and principles. I don't want to teach them just so they get a good grade or do well on a test. I don't want them to just know facts. I don't worry as much about grades as I do about whether they actually know what I'm trying to teach them.
5. Socialization. Yep, I school at home because it is a better way to socialize my kids. Seriously. Who really thinks that putting kids all one age, together in one room, with only one or two adults is a great way to socialize kids? (Especially in middle school) If you do, I laugh in your general direction. Who's teaching your kids character? Other kids who don't know any more about life than your kids do! And they may be people that you don't know and may not even approve of. Other kids are the most powerful influence on a school aged kid in a school setting.
The other is the teacher in front of the class. How well do you know them? I'm not trying to down teachers. Most of them are great, and I appreciate the time and effort that many of them put into their classes. It's certainly a thankless job. Unfortunately, our experience with public school, and a few of the teachers, has left a bad taste in our mouths. They did not have our set of values and beliefs, and it came through in their teaching and how they handled the kids.
My kids hang out with kids and adults of all different ages and treat them all equally. Most of the homeschooled kids that I've met have done the same, but most of the public schooled kids I've dealt with treat adults with either fear or contempt and younger children with disdain. At most they tolerate people of different ages. Unless their parents have purposely put them in settings with people of all ages, they may not be able to socialize well with those younger or older than them.
You will get that odd set of homeschooled kids who are....... well....... weird, but you have public schooled children who are the same. (I should know. I was an odd duck in my school years.)
6. Who really believes that government run schooling is actually a GOOD thing? They will be run by the Federal government in no time flat, and if you don't believe that, I once again laugh in your general direction. There is not a one sized fits all education. Our kids learn differently. God made them unique. We must teach according to how they learn. Just like we love according to how someone feels love.
I've been doing a little research on the new common core being rolled out by our federal government, and honestly it worries me. At the end of this post I will link two YouTube videos on one state's interpretation of common core standards. Please watch both. They are very informative, especially the second one.
7. The public school setting engenders "group think". You might like that, but I don't. As I stated before, God made kids unique. One of the ways that He made them like Him was in their creativity. He also made them individuals with minds of their own. While I do believe that kids need to learn to work together in group settings, I want my kids to know that they are individually responsible for every one of their actions and decisions, whether good or bad. They are not responsible for any one who is not specifically under their care or teaching. I also don't want them to "go along with the crowd". I tell my kids all the time that I don't want them to be like everyone else. I want them to be an example. I want them to be logical and not depend on the emotion and biased opinions of others. This is also discussed in the second video that I mentioned before.
8. I want them to actually love learning and not just learn dry facts. I want it to come alive to them. We make life a learning experience for the kids and include as many field trips and messy experiments as we can.
9. Lastly, in science, kids are being taught that evolution is fact. Mathematically speaking, without God leading it, it is impossible. It takes just as much or more faith to believe in evolution, as it does Creationism. But they weren't taught any other theory. I don't want my children to miss anything because someone else might be offended by the teaching.
10. I'm hesitant to share this one. The idea of bullying has become so broad that kids freedom of speech is being systematically shut down. What public schools are pushing, as far as bullying is concerned, can overreach and tend toward political correctness. Don't get me wrong. Bullying is horrible, and it's becoming an epidemic. It must be addressed. But I think that as an American society we must step carefully. Children should be taught to be kind and thoughtful towards others. But if we go as far as teaching them political correctness as young children what will it look like when they are adults? Will they know how to respectfully disagree with someone, or will they just go along because they are scared to hurt someone's feelings? What if we teach them that if they don't agree with someone they must keep it to themselves, or tolerance means we must accept everyone's beliefs and not just them as a person? What are the consequences of that teaching? Are we growing a weak willed group, or a strong, respectful, self-assured individual?
There are so many smaller reason that we homeschool, but these are our big reasons. I'd love to hear what yours are, so please share them below.
Next post: The big question: Curriculum
P.S. I realize, as a homeschool mother, that my writing above wasn't always grammatically correct and my sentence structure was often wrong. If you are wondering about my writing style, I am taking my favorite author's advice (that he's given in many of his books), and writing how I speak. That author is Dean Koontz. Check out some of my favorites like Lightning, his Frankenstein series, Soul Survivor, or The Door To December. I love how he wraps science fiction, suspense, romance, and comedy into one novel. And, no, I'm not being paid to say this. :)
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